Written mid of 2016
Let me just give you a quick recap of why I am writing this.
Early this 2016, I started condo sharing with friends and after that, some workmates. Yes! Living in one condo with workmates or friends sounds really really fun. You can talk about anything girly all-night-long, then you can definitely share your own stories about that one hot guy you’re all crush-ing. But hey, somewhere along the way, you will miss the old you. Your old place, when all you have to think of is just yourself. I swear you will definitely miss those times you live alone.
Aside from the most famous “Walking in my apartment naked”, there are so much more to miss about living alone. And here are three major points I’d like to share:
1. Personal Space
Of course, this is what I miss the MOST! Who wouldn’t want that little place you call your own? A space where you can do all those crazy stuff you can’t do around others, where you can sleep all day during weekends, say the words you’ve been holding back for someone, where you talk to yourself when you feel like you’re having a mid-life crisis when in reality, you’re only 21. That space where you can cry the whole day about the things that bother you, or even the smallest thing like running out of shampoo. I so miss having a personal space. ‘A space where you can just be you.
But when you start to live a cost-effecient life which is sharing instead of renting solo, every place in the pad is a common space. Your most beloved kitchen, bathroom, your one and only bed, even chairs… EVERYTHING! Everything is shared. So from personal space, you go no space. No space for misplaced comb, messy make-ups and no space to be a couch potato.
I am a very private person, really. Maybe it’s not obvious because I’m very vocal and talkative most of the time especially with friends or at work. I always always always make sure that during weekends, I can pamper myself at home. Or just reward myself with a 14-hour sleep and wont even care about what time will I wake up.
Most of the time I just want to be alone and I don’t want to be bothered. I don’t know, I just feel the need to be on my own. It feels good. It’s just you, your pillow, a good movie and good food.
When you’re sharing, well, you still have privacy, only when you’re in bathroom. But still not the full privacy since you’ll have to consider your housemates that will use it after you. So I call it my “5-minute privacy”. There are times too that you don’t wanna see anyone or talk to anyone and having housemates won’t give you that satisfaction of shutting up. Why?
* They might think you’re such a snob. Well I am, but not every time.
* As a housemate, they need to ask you something about house bills or misplaced things. So no choice, you’ll need to answer.
* Mahirap na machismis na may attitude problem. So you really need small talks in between your hibernation days.
3. Personal Decisions
This is one of the things I struggle with. I am used to living an independent life since I was college, so every time I make decisions, they’re my own. From how to do things, how to how get my shit together when I’m broken, how to spend my money, to how I budget every single cent of my salary, IT’S ALL ON ME.
But when you live with other people, you always have to take consideration of everyone. This is seriously tough for me. We all know that every one, has different personality, so it’s kinda hard to compromise sometimes. There are things that you wanna do or you used to do when you were living alone that you can’t do now. Like my fascination of blow drying my very thick hair every damn day in front of my fan! I. CAN’T. DO. THAT. NOW. Because that’s pretty loud and you’d have to think of your housemates. I am not that evil to blow dry in the bedroom while others are sleeping. So I have to do it in the bathroom that once you’re done, you’re soaking wet of sweat.
Buying appliances are not that easy either. No matter how you wanted to purchase that refrigerator because it’s 30% off, you can’t. Because you must consult everybody, because that will consume electricity or it’s out of their budget. The microwave, or that cutest bread toaster you’ve ever seen – you need to ask everyone. Every decision comes in group.
But hey, I’m writing this not to spread negativity to people who’s currently living with friends or workmates. This is not a plain rant over my present state of living, either. Hello? I’m looking back and appreciating the pure bliss that independence has given me… before! Just kidding, someone’s just being real here.
Seriously, living with different people can be fun and a total party. You just have to be ready for some changes and [minor] adjustments. It’s not something that can happen overnight. So you have to be patient and extra understanding about everything and everyone. It’s actually a major step by step process. If I am having hard time adjusting over these things, I’m sure that other people like me are struggling too. So we always have to look at things two-way. It’s never gonna work if we’ll just focus on the negative things that’s happening around. Get to know your housemates, build a connection, bond together and feed your home with positive vibe.